Too many blogs, I keep jumping from one to the other, I am getting addicted, but I like to get to know bloggers, their styles and stories, I like to connect with them. So I have spent most of today adding blogs to my favorites list, so I can get to know these people better, it's an endless process.. I'm tired now.
Today my chest nearly failed on me, for years now I have been allergic to dust and humidity, that basically means I am allergic to the air in any non-dry polluted place, limiting my options really and giving me a hard time as I am usually either in blissfully dusty Cairo, or residing by the beach in the South of France. My allergy kicks in around May, goes full blast in July and August, and becomes non-existent in the winter, so obviously, I am currently recovering from the last two months. So over the summer, I have apparently over-abused my ventoline inhaler, making my heart go too fast, and forcing my lungs to open up too much, I have been smoking and partying regardless of my knowledge that my allergies plus my cholesterol levels mean that I simply cannot afford to smoke. This morning I woke up with a lymph node swollen into another chin, inflamed and blocked ear and throat. I drove myself to the doctors clinic, relayed the allergy history, where she informed me that all my allergy medicine and dosages need adjustment and that I have run down my respiratory system, the swollen gland was my immunity system telling me that it has crashed, and that it is sick of me and fighting my idiocy.
I was tired and in pain, but nothing to complain about, she said it was normal I am tired, and told me to rest for a few days. I left her feeling as I do when I leave doctors clinics, I did my part, will follow instructions, now lets get on with one's life. Then it began to happen, at the pharmacy I could not stand up from the escalation of the pain in my chest, I sat on the floor till served, walking to my car I saw a friend and ignored her, raced to my car with only the thought of getting home on my mind. Once home my chest felt free to almost completely stop functioning, I speed dialed best friend, who is very aware of my chest attacks, and only managed to say one word "come". Well acquainted with how much it takes me to ask for help let alone anything, she was over in 5 mins, by then I was immobile on my couch, trying not to panic, move as little as possible and to get my breathing to be as least painful as possible, when I saw her I started crying, and I am not one who cries easily unless I'm at the cinema. I was terrified, and when she said lets go to the hospital, to my amazement I instantly agreed, it felt like a hospital worthy state, but I could not move and breathe at the same time apparently, it was not even an option. God bless France, when she called for an ambulance, explaining the minimal information she could get out of me, after 15mins they refused to come for me, they told her since I have seen a doctor I should sit through and it will pass. After three hours they were proven right.
E has been texting me all day, worried sick, T has been over to make sure I am still in one piece which is touching as T is anti-worry and sympathy which I love him for, and has promised to come back after his work meeting so if I have another attack he will be there. I hate feeling helpless, and I loathe sympathy. I wish T would come back and watch a movie with me and make fun of me so I can sleep.