Friday, December 14, 2007

Falling Out

I don't know why it's called falling out of love. I really don't. I don't think the decision to be with someone or not has much to do with love....
I still love the few men i was once in love with. I still love them very much, i would still do pretty much anything for them. I still regard them softly, i still have feelings of affection for them, i still love them. I don't think i have fallen out of love with them... at all.
People should call it falling out of want... or need... or habit...
Getting over someone like a bad habit, or an addiction. Shifting our attention elsewhere, shifting our desires elsewhere..
Falling out of want,your mind deciding that you don't want to have the love, you only need to feel it, not own it. To love for the sake of love, and not feed off it. To love with no reciprocation, and no fixation, an absolute abstract love with no expectation. A love that is let go of. A subtle lingering bitter sweetness that is irrelevant to anyone's actions.
I don't think any love that was truly felt can be undone, unfelt. Love is not something we acquire, it's something we realize within ourselves, brought out by people we cross paths with. I cannot unrealize love, if i had my way with the world that would be a crime.
But hell, if i had my way with the world no one would recognize it anymore.

Falling out of want... yes i am.
Yes i am...

4 comments:

Cairene said...

It's true. If you ever loved them, there's no way to unlove them. It kind of lies there inactively. You know it's there, you feel it from time to time like you get an old broken ring out, then you put it back.

I don't think there's falling out of love, either.

Jade said...

I believe that you can unlove someone even if you trully loved them... It's an interesting prespective how you put it really... But there are different kinds of Love & maybe the way people define being "In Love" is in the need, want, obsession, addiction... etc.

I feel out of Love to previous lovers whom I still care for very much...

Interesting post...

Nora said...

I really like this post... you write brilliantly!
Other than that, I am glad you are falling out of want..
I hope you're feeling good!!

Forsoothsayer said...

yep, i currently unlove a dude i definitely used to love. i hung out with him recently and could not even see what i saw in him, i was frankly nothing but bored. he still looks the same and i was not remotely attracted. i think it just takes a super long time....he was 7 years ago. cos i still kind of love the more recent dudes.