Monday, December 18, 2006

The Gemini Man

This is not the beginning of a series, i am not about to start posting about the female and male version of each sun sign, relax, and if you don't believe in horoscopes just skip the post altogether. This is just me highlighting my amusement, there is nothing to learn here, unless of course you have a Gemini male figure in your life. He needn't be your boyfriend, hardly, it is very unlikely he will be your boyfriend and if he is may the heavens be with you.

I am a Gemini man magnet, i do not choose them, i promise you i don't, they somehow show up. And in fear of being the person whose first question is always "what's your sun sign?", i tend to only get to ask that question after it is too late, way too late.
Having said that, i am of course taking the piss, because the Gemini man is obvious, does not need to introduce himself, so easy to spot, he might as well have it written on his forehead: make way, i am Gemini man.
In case you are not trained, he will be that guy sitting alone at the bar and making friends with the whole bar in half an hour. He will be the guy with a smile for everyone, and a special bond with every friend. He will be the flirt, yet he will also be the man who cannot plan beyond this beer, and will most probably not call back. He's that guy on the go looking so very busy and important because he has over booked himself in his enthusiasm. He looks like he's fun, if he stays long enough for you to take notice.
For the past two years of my life at any point in time i have had at least one Gemini man in my life, sometimes two, lately we are up to three and four. Sometimes one is a boyfriend the other is a friend, sometimes they are all friends, one time two were being dated at the same time (they both knew OK?), and other times, most times, i didn't know what the hell was going on myself.
So obviously i am used to Gemini's, so whats new today? what is knew today is that this past week i have had four incident with 4 different Gemini men. Four!

A Gemini ex, a Spanish Gemini ex, passed through my town, naturally asked to meet up for dinner, as expected by the end of dinner i was getting the ever so Geminian intense looks of "are you feeling what I'm feeling?" The trained Leo that i am, i looked him straight back in the eye long enough to make a point, then looked away gracefully sipping my wine like nothing was insinuated and nothing was refused. He walked me to my car, sat with me in the car, and as a true Geminian the moment gripped him and he crumbled to his doubts of "why did i let you go?"
Had i not known that he has done this 700 times before to 200 different girls, i might have given in to his apparent torment, had i not known that his girlfriend had just moved in with him, i might have been tempted to give in to his cry for comfort that was absolutely heartfelt. Had i not known he was a Gemini, i would've perceived the situation completely differently and let the tears in his eyes affect my judgment. He went back to his hotel disappointed and confused, and surely enough, next day he called me bubbly and happy to have met an old friend.
End of incident one.

Last week i got a phone call, from a friend of ages ago, a school friend. You know those crushes that go on endlessly? I believe we flirted with no further action from 12 to 17. We of course are great friends, that's the thing with me and Gemini men, we are always great friends.
This guy calls me to reproach me for not calling him back when i said i would, that was a month ago when he had called me for the first time in two years. And for the next 45 mins he went into the million reasons i should move to Dubai where he resides. How he would take care of me, find me a job, how the best thing that could ever happen to him would be my moving to Dubai. Baam, out of nowhere and the first contact in two years.
He was complaining about how futile relationships in Dubai are, so i asked him why do you want to bring me over and doom me then? His reply was "just you come here and don't you worry about that".
He asked me to email him my CV, i said i would, i hung up and realized i didn't have his email, and I'm sure when he didn't get it he figured that out as well. He still hasn't called back, and i know he will not be calling back. For he is of course, a Gemini.
End of incident two.

I have a Gemini guy friend, the most solid Gemini i have ever seen, yes his business may overwhelm him, yes he is witty and flattering by nature, yes he manages to steer all focus away from himself while scrutinizing you as they all do, but truly the most sincere correct Gemini I've come across (mind you i am yet to speak to his girlfriend, so you never know).
We had a bit of an argument the other day, i had my case all prepared and i was going to make my point if it was the last thing i did that day, and surely enough, like the Gemini he is despite himself, with a few sentences of completely out of character straight forward simplicity, i lost all my anger and caved in then and there.
I can never stay mad at a Gemini man. They are too boyishly innocent all of a sudden that you feel you are being unjust to them by rightfully being upset!
End of episode 3.

T, recently renamed Hans, sent me an email two nights ago. T is at the end of a 5 week crossing, and by crossing i mean crossing the Atlantic via sailing boat. The email was the gloomiest thing i had ever read i think. He was miserable; out of cigarettes, breaking up fights on the boat, sun burnt and complaining that he doesn't have the frostbite that makes it feel like Xmas. He somehow managed to whine about being alone in St.Martin for Xmas. If you met T you would know in a second that alone in St.Martin for Xmas is exactly the way he should be, and watch the man end up with a choice between 4 women to take home.
I was a bit, just a bit, concerned (mind you i know he's a Gemini), so as the faithful partner in our non-committed casual dead end relationship that i am, i sent an email back. My email was cheerful and happy, sympathetic and up lifting, i was really rather sweet, which i try to not be too much with Gemini men. I got an email this morning telling me he was island hopping and fishing and not to worry if he sounded a little blue last night, it must have been the heat.
I wont really call this an incident as T usually does this to me several times a day.

Now i know, because i have come to know, that this unfortunate male sign has trouble with consistency, has moods and tantrums, has a strange combination of a pessimistic/cheerful view on life. I know because i have been taught that these men can get away with murder, and the only thing that stops them from even murder, is themselves. You see i know, but you might not know, and even if you don't care to know, this post in not to persuade you to care.
This post is to stop me from writing "if you are a Gemini man please walk south from me" on my forehead.

9 comments:

Maat said...

*sigh* gemini... air signs.. can't help loving them though!

La Gitana said...

so funny! I'm a leo and I also have problems with gemini men. Well, not really a problem, but I notice I've dated more geminis than any other sign. The only other signs I've dated have been libra, aquarious and cancer.

I like gemini men right before they star being completely random and erratic, but you're right about one thing you just can't stay mad at them they're so... innocent and adorable.

Insomniac said...

so true.. poor u.. i mean all those gemini men.. i am a gemini myself and i would have never gotten involved with one of them.. can't deny they have their charm tho.. if ur into horoscopes, linda goodman's love signs is a must.. ushould read the gemini man vs. leo woman chapter :)

Will E. said...

Speaking as a Gemini man, this sort of post or even writing 'if you're a Gemini man please walk away from me' on your forehead is exactly the kind of thing that will keep them coming..

You're doomed I'm afraid and there's no escape :)

N said...

Maat: i don't like air signs at all. Gemini men i obviously like, libra women are lovely if you can handle madness.

Other than that, spare me. only bad experiences for me.

La gitana: aquarius? why oh why? my least favourite kind by far.

Insomniac: isn't it freakishly obvious that both her love and sun sign book have been on the shelf since i was six? the things our parents pass on to us!
thank you for sympathizing :-)

Will: ain't that the truth! there is no escape, save from getting me a non gemini man to beat them off :) that should be fun.

Faisal said...

WOW!

Stop! Halt! Cease! Desist!

Aquarians kick ass!

(Sentence without exclamation mark.)

I'm an Aquarian, my brother is a Gemini. I honestly, and sincerely, think that I'm cooler.

So there you go. Aquarians kick ass.

N said...

Faisal: you may personally be the exception of the rule, especialy if you are truly cooler than a gemini, being cool is mainly what they have going for them really.

I could possibly agree to you kick ass, possibly, but all aquarians?
not a chance.

Thanks for commenting, your first i believe :)

Faisal said...

Ya setee...

In truth, my brother is perceived (falsely) by many to be the cooler sibling.

His Nazi-like self-propaganda techniques is the reason behind this, or so my theory goes.

2oleelee ba2a, what was wrong, generally keda, with the aquarians you've dealt with. Names and addresses would help as well. I will, in the words of Terry Pratchett, see to it that they are... inhumed.

Shivangi Singh said...

I am a Leo woman with exactly the same dilemma- Gemini men just seem to waltz into my life like no other zodiac sign. They lie, cheat, manipulate and I somehow still end up forgiving them and being friends. I wish they would stay away from me for good.